Back to writing as a release.
So I have been working on expressing myself better so people know exactly how I feel. It's getting tough. I say no to some very well. Others I need to work on. No longer concerned about what others may think when its all over so that's a good thing.
My releases:
Text messages I send that are gone unanswered or responded to days later. First of volve its just me but there is always a moment to send a message back. I've been busy is bullshit. Just so its known, when I don't respond you will know why. That's my passive aggressive trait taking over!
I text because people act like they can not pick up the phone, plus its so much easier when I am not available to talk on the phone.
Text messages sent asking if I can stop by before you go to work.
A. Booty Call
B. I have a life. It does not include driving out my way to your house.
C. Hell no.
D. What in the hell do you think this is?
If you want to see me there are other ways of asking and the request may be made possible.
You ask someone if you can spend time the day with their child, mind you yes it is their child so saying no is fine. They respond that taking them out of daycare for a day will still cost them money. Then after thought say sure can you keep them all day long and also my other child too.
Uh.....seriously. It's from one extreme to the next. 24 hours ago you were losing money for taking one child from daycare now you are wanting to take both out and ask me to keep them til 9 o'clock at night. Yea ok. I think not.
Then at work today. Our office meeting. They are dreaded by most, it makes me no difference but after today OMG! I brought up getting a water cooler at the last meeting so we could have cold water. We have a sink but it does not get very cold and it doesn't taste so well. We have a freezer ice machine with 17 people in the office. You do the math. Cold water is only possible if you bring bottled water. So people agreed, check the prices and let them know. I did and people complained............boy did they. Only 6 of us want the cooler and dammit we are getting it! I swear others had better stay clear of the water!
I am done trying! Done reaching out and trying to make things work.....friendships in particular. I am good. I will find new friends and if I don't my momma and me will do.
2 comments:
Are you sure you are no longer concerned with what people think?
As for text messages, maybe you failed to give the other person a reason to respond. Saying hello or have a nice day doesn't cut it for some of us.
Fluff and more fluff.
Friendships are like water. You have to water them. Nuture them. Also, your mother won't be here forever.
I am semi fully there on the subject of not being concern but as humans it is in our nature to care what others think. Something else taught in my cult. Reason why people try so hard to impress others...once I have fully overcame it then I can focus on Brandi and accepting me where I am.
As for text messages people who value my friendship will in fact text back its thoses that I attempt to reach out to and nothing is sent back. I am not referring to hello. Asking a direct question deserves a response.
Friendships are like plants or seeds maybe? Nuturing does occur but again I am done. Fact about my mom but while she is here she will be my friend.
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